Ask Ciiku: How do I move on?

How do you let go and move on from someone you love who has decided they don’t want you anymore? What are the practical steps you should take?

Anonymous.

Dear Anonymous,

Unrequited love hurts. I have been there anonymous and it hurts.

I like how your question explicitly asked for practical steps to move on and let go. And I will try my best but let me first say that TIME will be your best asset. In time, you will think of the person less and less and move on and let go.

However, in the meantime there are things you can do to start the process:

Delete all previous communication with said person. There is always a tendency to go back to the history and analyse and over analyse what may have happened. You don’t need that now. Do it. Done? Cool.
Block the person on your phone and social media pages. No need to tempt yourself by going to their page or timeline to see what they are up to. Or look at their number and being tempted to text or call them.
Do new things – You know that list most of us have of things we would like to do? There is no time like the present. Get into it.
Stay home and watch TV, read, listen to music, sleep, cook, eat… whatever it is. Just be.
Make new friends – And I don’t mean just anyone here. I mean seek out people who replenish you, who are kind and honest. People who want to spend time with you and help you grow and be.

And also don’t fight yourself when you think about that person. Don’t hate yourself. Show yourself grace.

Find peace.

Ciiku.