Recently, I was told things that hurt me. They were meant to hurt me, to blackmail me even. However, part of doing inner work is realising when this is happening and not feeling swayed. Now, knowing this doesn’t make the pain less, but it does make it easier to see things for what they are and as a result, not hold onto it, not let it consume me.
I think what was most fascinating to me was the insistence by the person that they loved me. Of course it is meaningless because they refuse to see my humanity and I know this. And therefore their adamance in saying they love me as if it should mean something, means nothing.
All they see is my utility in their lives and my refusal to bend to their whims is met with self righteous indignation of which I have no time to entertain.
None of this is easy, but I refuse to betray myself.